2 schnauzers, 1 blog

Get Well Soon Bertie

Bertie: I had to go to the vet today.

Oliver: I got to go too!

Bertie: Yes, but it's always fun-er when it's not you who has to go. I got weighed - 12.4 kilos which is ok, 'cause I'm so tall.  And then the vet lady looked at my sore foot, which had a lumpy bit on it and was very itchy. The hoomans had already bandaged it up for me the night before, so I couldn't scratch it.

Oliver: You did look funny!

Bertie: Yeah, thanks. Anyway, the vet lady said it was some kind of benign tumor (eek!) but she said it would go away in a week, and if it didn't, I could have a small operation. So I have some ointment and I have to change my bandage everyday.

Oliver: I think I'll get a cookie every time you have to have ointment put on, so it won't all be bad.

Bertie: Anyway, although the bandage is interfering with my fluffy, it doesn't interfere with my eating, and I won't have to have a bath for a couple of weeks.

Who needs sleep?

Bertie: I'm slee-ee-py...

Oliver: Well, you shouldn't have kept us up all night, should you?

Bertie: I couldn't help it. I had insomnia.

Oliver: What does that mean - oh wait, does that mean you have to keep everyone in the house awake all hours of the night with your prowling and your woofing?

Bertie: It means it's not my fault that I did that.

Oliver: Hmm. I'm suspicious that this insomnia thing is a bit of a cop out.

Bertie: Well, nuts to you.

Oliver: And then, not only did you keep me awake, you got extra special snuggles and I had to sleep on my own at the end of the bed.

Bertie: heh heh. yep, I won. Special snuggles and my insomnia went. And I softly snored the rest of the night away.

Oliver: Snoring which also kept me up.

Bertie: The alarm went off way to early.

Oliver: (glare) For everyone.

Get Well Soon Oliver

Bertie: Oliver is sick.
First he threw up on the ottoman (which I like to sit on)
Then he threw up on the bed (which I sleep on)
Then he threw up on three different spots on the carpet (which I wasn't so fussed about)

His tummy really hurt, and he was keeping me awake with all the vomiting and moving around trying to get comfortable, so about 4.30 this morning we all got in the car and went to the 24 hour hospital. I love the car. Oliver sat in the front and whimpered a lot.

I hadn't been to the Emergency room before, so I was really excited. Oliver didn't seem to be as excited. He just lay on the exam table and shivered. If I stood on my toes I could just see over the top of the table, so I looked at him a couple of times. The vet lady took his temperature and felt his tummy. While she was doing that I went and weighed myself.

The vet lady said he might have pancreatitis, which we schnauzers are very susceptible to, so she decided to keep him in the hospital and run some tests. She also said he was quite dehydrated, so he was going to go on a drip. I tried to make a joke about him already being a drip, but no one laughed. I got to sit in the front seat on the way home, though.

It took a while before the blood tests came back and they knew what was wrong with Oliver. It turns out he has a very bad case of gastro.

The vet lady tried to give him some chicken tonight but he didn't want any, so he must be really really sick! If I had been there I could have eaten it for him.

So he's staying in hospital again tonight and we can pick him up tomorrow. It's strangly quiet without him. No one is annoying me and it feels Wrong.

Unimpressed

Bertie: Oliver just took my spot on the couch. Colour me Unimpressed.

Licked

Oliver: Bertie decided I wasn't clean enough, so he held me down and licked my face clean. He cleaned my eyes, my ears and the top of my head. I struggled, I really did.

 

The Aftermath.

Bertie: I do a good job. After all, look at my tongue!

V E T

Oliver: Yesterday I went to the V-E-T. I have to spell it out, because for some unknown reason Bertie luuurves the vet's and will -

Bertie: Bark, bark! Did you mention the Vet?

Oliver: Sigh. Yes.

Bertie: I love the vet.

Oliver: Yes, I know. But not everyone shares your enthusiasm. Particularly when there are injections involved.

Bertie: I had one too, you know. It was heartworm prevention time.

Oliver: But I had two. And the vet shaved my chest.

Bertie: Well, you had a hot spot. Too much lying on your stomach sleeping, I reckon. 

Oliver: I have to take tablets. At least I get them hidden in cubes of cheese.

Bertie: And I get to have cheese too, so we all win.

That Sasha again

Oliver: That Sasha came around again.

Bertie: She has too much energy. She bit me on the leg.

Oliver: She got me by the beard!

Bertie: Ok, you win.

Oliver: And she's so fast, I barely see her before she strikes.

Bertie: Asleep; she is Mild Mannered Puppy. Awake; she is the Biting Blur.

Oliver: I remember when I could move fast enough to be a Blur...

Talking birds? What's next, non-edible plastic?

Oliver: We have to tell them about that bird.

Bertie: What bird?

Oliver: That pink one we saw the other day. The one that - shudder - spoke to me. What is with that? I didn't know they could talk.

Bertie: Oh, that was Birdy, the Galah. She does that. She can say hello, and goodbye, and Freya, and Birdy, and Bye-Bye. And the some words I can't repeat.

Oliver: Well it's just wrong. Birds are meant to flap and fly and cower before me. Not try to converse.

Bertie: Just ignore her and come and have a drink from this great bowl I've found.

Oliver: That's the fish pond.

Bertie: Whatever, it tastes good.

Oliver: Seriously; dude.